What You’re Feeling is Platform Fatigue (Or: Why I’m Not Joining Threads)

It’s October 2022. The skies are red and darkening. Somewhere in a haunted lair, Elon Musk cackles maniacally. Journalists everywhere sharpen their proverbial quills and write their latest think pieces on why Twitter is going to die and why everyone needs to jump on Mastodon —

Wait. No, that’s not right.

It’s January 2023. A blustering wind rattles the shutters. Content creators wrap themselves up in their warmest blankets as they read the newest story from tech tastemakers: “Leave Mastodon behind! Everyone who’s someone is flocking to Plurk, the Twitter replacement The People have been waiting for — ”

Hang on. That’s not right either.

It’s April 2023. Exhausted crocuses timidly peep out from the softening ground. Beleaguered and weary readers click on the most recent newsletter from the top voices in media, all about how Bluesky — no, it’s Post — no, it’s Substack — no, it’s Spill — no, it’s Truth Social —

It’s July 2023. I browse the news as I eat my breakfast. A headline catches my eye: “Twitter killer: What you need to know about Instagram’s Threads.”

I sigh. I take my oatmeal to my patio. In the background, I hear (real) birds tweeting. I open a book.

Lord, I’m tired.

Doesn’t it feel like we’re stuck in a time loop? Every month brings a new platform that we’re pressured into joining.

And I’m tired of social media. I’m so tired of new platforms cropping up, and being told that I need to be on them in order to succeed/become an influencer/not miss the next big thing. It’s boy-who-cried-wolf syndrome, because so often, it isn’t true. Every platform that was so hot and fresh last month is decried as dead in the water next month, cast down to the ground to make way for the next hot and fresh platform. (Anyone remember Clubhouse or BeReal?)

At this point, I can only conclude that our motivation is FOMO. We all know someone who was an early Instagram adopter, or an early Twitter adopter, or an early TikTok adopter, who managed to make it big because they were the first ones there.

Or maybe it’s schadenfreude fueling it now, as salty journalists and ex-Twitter users gleefully rub their hands to watch Twitter’s eventual successor rise —wait, no,not that one, it’s this one— wait, no, it’s this one, it’s this…